Atlanta Office "Secret Santa" Gift Summary for 1998
Theme: "The Epitome of Man"
- Article: "The Harmful Effects of Smoking"
- Big Hamburger cookie jar
Theme: "You buy the chocolates, but think big, and you could
be a Vice President"
- Big Hershey Kiss, other candies
Theme: "Kevin is so quiet, he doesn't release his emotions. Here's
a gift to help him."
- Small dartboard
- Targets, with names of business associates and Dilbert pictures
Theme: Past drinking stories
Theme: "Star Trek Viewing Kit"
(In an E-mail, Mark said that he'd rather chew metal and scrape his
head with a cheese grater than watch a Star Trek movie)
- Tin foil popcorn
- Cheese grater
Theme: Too much travel
- Children's book: "Best Travel Activity Book Ever!"
- Children's USA map puzzle
Theme: Ben had to dress up in women's clothing at a recent fraternity function
- Box labeled "Ben's Secret" ("Victoria's Secret" with "Victoria's" crossed out and "Ben's" written in).
- Neet Hair Remover
- Gaudy Lingerie
Theme: With her new responsibilities, Lisa must sit through telecons.
- Toothpicks (to keep eyes open)
- Dilbert legal pad (for taking notes)
- Zip disk with "Web Deployment", which will do EVERYTHING for her.
Theme: Inspector Gadget gets another high-tech toy
- Rock (Read the note!)
Theme: Andy's late a lot.
- Dr Suess book: "I am not going to get up today"
- Article: "Why I was late" (A contest to come up with the best ridiculous
- Wind-up Alarm Clock
Theme: Earl collects strange light strings
- Electrified Blinking Santa Heads
- Christmas Dove Lights
Theme: "Tooth Extraction and Repair Kit"
(Sherry had some nasty dental problems earlier in the year)
- Dots Candy (To pull the old tooth out)
- Gum (To build a new tooth)
- Knife (To shape new tooth)
- Sandpaper (To sand down new & old teeth so they match)
- Super Glue (to attach new tooth)
- Wax (ditto)
- Advil (for pain)
- Mask (To hide her errant smile)
Theme: "Home Gecko Barbecue Kit"
(Scott has two geckos in a herpetarium in his office)
- Barbecue sauce
- Gecko recipes
- Description of how to skin and cook a gecko
- Other stuff..
(Schadenfreude is a German word meaning "Evil Joy" It refers to gaining
joy out of someone else's suffering.)
- Videotape of car crashes
- Roofing shingles (so that we can all experience Schadenfreude at Doug's expense, since he recently missed a week of work with the disease "Shingles".)
Theme: Mark is hard on equipment - losing pagers, breaking laptops, etc.
- Pager/Cell Phone Leash
- Laptop Monitor Protector
- "Replacement Pixels" (candy sprinkles he can use to replace pixels on a broken laptop monitor)
- Etch-a-Sketch (a replacement laptop, in case he breaks his irreparably)
Theme: Dennis drives 90 minutes each way to work.
- Mountain Pine car air freshener (to make it seem like home, since he lives near Pine Mountain)
- Bead-massage seat cover
Theme: vanb is redecorating his apartment
- Print of "The Hustler" (Dogs playing pool)
Theme: With a wife and 8 kids, his family could be a baseball team