(First
remove the soft squarish package. [Survival Sash]) This
is your Super Survival Sash. You can
use it to store all of your important survival items. First unwrap and unfold it.
You will see a pocket. This
belongs in the upper right-hand part of the sash. This part will eventually be slung over your left shoulder, but first
you must add your survival items.
(Open
the small, hard package.[camera]) This item
should be placed in the pocket you just discovered. One thing both of your packs admire about you is your legendary
bravery. There is nothing you love more
than joining your packs in activities that leave them on the edge of danger,
such as a recent ISX skydiving adventure.
However, santa also recognizes your amazing capacity for
self-sacrifice. They have therefore
given you this camera so you may always selflessly remain behind and photograph
the rest of your pack whilst they experience mortal danger.
Below
the pocket you just placed the camera in, there is a small eyelet. (Open the long, mallet-ended, squishy
package.[Braves' Tomahawk]) Your secret santa recognizes
your supreme leadership when taking your packs out on field trips, and this is
to be commended. However, they have
also noticed a tendency to grab attention.
For example, at the Braves game you took Pack 730 to, you wanted to be
on TV so much, you lofted two of your Pack members into the air and started
banging them together while shouting fervent support to the Braves and ribald
insults to their rivals. So that this
need not happen again, they have provided you with this Braves emblem that you
may wave about instead. Make sure to
place this in the sash with the part that says "Braves" on it pointing upward.
If
you flip your survival sash over, you will see two eyelets, both wider than the
one on the front. (Open the tall,
pole-esque package. [Door-shutter, consisting of a plunger on a long, retractable handle]) One of your
biggest duties to your ISX pack is engaging in telecons. Although those at ISX greatly appreciate the
fact that you shout at the top of your lungs instead of simply kicking us out
of the ISX office, your secret santa would like to help you to not have to lose
your voice through your variegated telecons.
To this end, they have created the easily carriable, extensible Super
Survival Door Shutter. They thought if
you just shut your dang door, it would save everyone a boatload of
trouble. Make sure to always lock the
Super Survival Door Shutter into place by turning the handle after retracting
or extending it, and make sure to practice using it before your life depends on
it. Once you have tried out your door
shutter, slip it through the two eyelets on the back of your Survival Sash,
making sure that the bulbous end is pointed upwards (it will be closer to the camera
than to the Braves doohickey).
Now
that you have placed all the items into your Survival Sash, you may don the
Survival Sash. There are pins attached
to the paper to help you if it slides.
Now you're ready for anything!